my life big joke.

i hate it man. We even visit the same site at the same time. And yet all these you will never know.

Heaven's making fun of me.

Maroon 5: This love

This love has taken its toll on me, she said goodbye too many times before..

and yes she is leaving again. Even though im not even sure that im that person you are referring to(yes, once again), you are again doing such things to me. How unfair.

Can't you love me like how you love that person. You don't need to care about anything. You would just wish to be with him. But when you said you love me, it's never the same. And that you always have to leave at the end.

Maybe I don't know how to love a woman. Maybe im not who you are looking for. Handsome linguistic man, equipped with latest fashion.

I really tried very very hard to give you everything. Every night since 2 years ago i have been thinking of you. I wonder how are you doing, I wonder when would you be a part of my life. All these looked so impossible as time passes.. as you start to forget me.

If there is no such thing as the law, and if i know that you have the slightest feeling for me, i would have ran to you. I would have grabbed you, never let you go. But once again i thought of your feelings. What if you dont like me at all? What if my these actions would only make things worse. So many what ifs. IF i was to be rational all these while, i would have listened to you, when you said you never loved me and all the while you treated me like a friend, when you asked me to look for a better girl..

All these while had made me realise that love is about you. And not me. If i had cared for myself, i think i would have given you up the day you said you love me never. I just want to be there when you need me. When the world turns against you, when you feel lost. When you just needed a person to lie on and cry.

Can't love be simpler? Can we stop complicating things now? I only wish to be by your side. I have once dreamt of us in the evergreen pastures, gazing stars at night, watching sunrises on the hilltop with you lying on my shoulder, flying kites in the day, and of course the sunsets.

But you are leaving now, never to return to me. Again. Who should i believe now? You who said you never loved me. Or you who said you missed me.. But everything's too late now. It doesnt matter anymore. You're leaving. I'm dying.

New timetable hurray!

When our VP said during last 2 weeks that the order of the periods will be the same, but the periods will be shortened to 55 mins from an hour, my class is like wt*? This is because the AO chinese students have already got back their results and all have already withdrawn from the subject, resulting in the very large number of empty periods in our timetable.. just imagine a period is 1 hour.

But today was a surprise to us. The timetable has been amended! Yay!! Wooooo-hoo! After much calculations i found out that the new timetable saved me a whooping 295 mins. A total of 4 hours and 55 freaking minutes!!! That's like enough for me to complete 9 DOTA games or 15 standard Warcraft III: The Frozen Throne 1 vs 1 games. omfg..............
just compare this new one with this old one!!!

wooohoooooooooo Mrs Pang roCks!

Today maths s paper i thought i will be receiving messages such as "sorry you are unsuitable to take maths s paper" or "you should take the time to focus more on your core subjects" but in the end the lecturer said that our own tutors would have marked it and are returning to us as soon as possible.. my maths period is tmr... stressedddd. he also added that if we score above 30% of the total marks which is 21/64, we can try to continue s paper. i think i will get 20s, P(X <25>20) = 0.65 !! if not 10s le.. then hope to appeal.. may the force be with me...

Ramblings from a lovelorn man.

Bereft man i am. No doubt.
How unfair it is that it's a sin for a man to cry.
And yet, in the society today,
it is uncommon to find a loving man unhurt
from the cruelty of women.

Maybe love got into me so much that i have
turned into a madman.
For many years I have been searching for
something worth living for.
I found love.
But it is love now that's making me so depressed!
What perfect irony.

Something that is so beautiful. So Magnificant.
Yet deadly. Entangling.
A double-edged sword for one who do not
know how to manage it.
A amazing thing called love.
That i so yearn for,
from the very woman i love.

Brightsparks scholarship preparatory workshop. Not?

Well i think this workshop worked just right for me. I've got all that i need to know in just the first 5 mins of the workshop. "If you are looking for high salaries, or wish to set up your own companies, then scholarships are not good for you.". "You can earn higher salaries when you got a good degree with good results and then work in a world class company."

In other words, i could walk out of the workshop right after they say this!

Not that im exactly money minded. Yes, work for passion not for money. Yes, life is not about earning money. I concur. And actually support this notion! Therefore, i intend to get the highest paying job (or at least above 'above average') so that i wont have to work for the money that are neccessary in life. Like money for housing property, family uses, wife:), children and maybe a car. Imagine i can earn all these 3 or 4 times an average person can. I can then retire early, or start enjoying luxury life from a young age. Of course i take into consideration working hours and also working environment. I aint no want overseas job(unless they sponsor sonic planes so i can get home by 7) and super long and 24/7 working hours like Doctors.

But i face a problem. I was classified Investigator. Aka "the Thinker". I'm inquisitive, scientific, observant, logical, curious and indenpendent. Im a f***ing nerd! Me aint no entreprenueristic hood yo. Aint no cool. Aint no mama's cookies. I can set up a hotel branch and would end up me living on the trees yo(ok cold joke in case you never got it). So there ain not big money and gold bling blings for meh yo.

But then again i hate studying. so ain no world class companies and kick ass jobs. sigh...

Brand new look.

A brand new look for my blog. More cheerful setting i would say. No, not that i have finally got back love. It's just a sudden urge. To make life better. Sort of a like automated mechanism inside every living organism. Clogging and self-repair of wounds.

But the wound would never heal completely. Even if it really would, the scar of that remains will be like the trigger of the gun pointing towards my own head.

But in this lonely world. I shall pursue the lonely lane. One of which few would venture in this materistic and degenerate world. I shall persist on. Fulfilling my promise of forever love. A long road ahead. To the end of time.