The Sanctuary

haven pack yet!

2011-08-05T02:41:00.002+08:00

hvn been blogging enough..

so my ippt got silver, and im slacking again. lol.. i know this lifestyle is quite unhealthy.. but unless there is a pathway in front of my door, i find it quite troublesome to go out for a jog :/

i will keep this blog alive for my duration of korea though, or probably fb, so do keep a lookout!

P.S.: im totally loving the game World of Tanks! guess the passion is in my blood as a tankee lol

ippt training plan

2011-06-08T20:44:00.004+08:00

Bedok Town Park

I don't know if you can see this.. basically this is the park behind where I live. The line in the middle is the starting point.

For the past two days, I had ran segments(loops) A and B. So it's 3km each time.

The first day was bad. Halfway through A (theres a chinup bar there where I always did my chinups whenever i run pass it for the first time) I already 'panchek'. Walked about 30% of A.

When I reached back the starting position, I started jogging again.. this time its also quite bad. I think I walked like 40% of B..

The revenge:

I went down to jog today.. this time I managed to jog the entirety of 3km!! Quite happy although its only 3km.. but of course I cant compare this achievement to what I was able to do 2 years ago.

So to show my determination to do well for my IPeePeeT this coming IseeT, I'm doing a little training schedule for myself.

The idea is to improve my stamina, then my speed.

Trainings to complete before IPeePeeT in 1 month's time:

A+B x2 - 6km endurance

A interval + B interval - 3km. (speed at second half of A, speed at second half of B)

A+B x2 - 6km recovery

A interval + B interval - 3km

A interval + B interval + A interval - 4.2km

A+B x3 - 9km endurance

A interval + B interval + B recovery - 4.8km

A+B - 3km speed

A+B - 3km speed(timed)

A+B x2 - 6km recovery

+probably 2.4km timed runs

There are about 4 weeks before IseeT.. so obviously I can't be slacking and I have to run at least twice a week!

Wish me luck :D

when it's 3am, go to sleep

2011-06-02T03:55:00.004+08:00

I was actually on my bed at 2am, but then i realised that i was quite sticky, so i decided to take a bath.

While waiting for my hair to dry, i was thinking maybe to post an new entry on how emo i was.. but my laptop lagged like 15mins due to a java update.

So in the end all i could do was a long overdued overhaul of my blog (although i didnt do much, since this is a standard template from blogger, lol).

Well, i shall leave my emoness to next time! Im actually tired now, as opposed to what i was 2 hours ago..

the games that we play

2011-02-25T03:55:00.000+08:00

http://ski.ihoc.net/

who remember playing this game? :)

2011-01-27T14:55:00.002+08:00

i just found out that the 80 dollar per month medicine i took last time costs 24 dollars at UHC. fml..

2011-01-24T13:58:00.000+08:00

things to do like right now,
internship cv,
24/2/2011 F grade in effect

2011-01-23T00:31:00.001+08:00

i won the first sc2 game on my bdae.. but my bdae means, im already 23 omfggg so old alr!!

23 years old, and rabbit year! i think im really affiliated with the number 23..

2011~

2011-01-01T12:16:00.004+08:00

as i looked through my previous year's entry, i realised i should put up a picture of fireworks.. but i hesitated because i didnt manage to take a nice one. well i have a video though.. but i lazy to upload la..

resolution for 2010

1. BE HAPPY

2. Meet more new friends!

3. Continue to improve on my guitar skills!

4. Finally find someone i like who likes me also (hopefully)

5. Stay healthy

Legend: Fulfilled, somewhat fulfilled, obviously not fulfilled

I think last year i was smart to make simple and little wishes. LOL. anw here's a summary of the wishes.

1. Last year was obviously happy for obvious reasons. At least i can say for me, i have found something that i really wanted. see point 4.

2. Well if we take things literally, then ya, i have met new friends.. but i have also made new friends in 2010!

3. I wasn't that good to begin with. But i think playing for one year makes me at least a slight bit better ba..

4. If you look at my last year's post, actually i made a secret wish about it.. (well.. not so secret.. you just have to highlight the part at point 4 to see what i wished for. google definitely knows about it though. lol)

5. I dont think i was very healthy at the start of year 2010. But well, i stayed almost the same..(actually i haven't exercised for long) haha but i still look the same though. myth confirmed.

2010 is definitely better than the last 5 years or so. There are things that i have finally let go, and things that I have come to accept, and things that i'd come to embrace.

2010 was a year of improvement. I was glad i had the courage to let go. When we have our hands full, we wouldnt have space for anything else.

Resolution for 2011

1. BE HAPPY

2. Meet more new friends!

3. Continue to improve on my guitar skills!

5. Stay healthy

6. Survive South Korea

7. IPPT GOLD! ($400!!) - this was actually a 2009 resolution

8. I wish that everyone who matters to me find their own happiness, be it to be from anything.

9. Though I have to admit i might have less time for people who had been with me through my darkest times all these years, I hope that our friendship will only become stronger!

Happy New Year!

Gibson

Things to do this super short holiday

2010-12-03T19:24:00.011+08:00

1. learn hangeul
2. piano+guitar
3. starcraft
4. module planning >.<

5. clean up/throw away JC stuff

6. get my fitness back

7. sep matters, recommendation letter
8

Edited:

The year is ending, but this year is very different. Things got going, and of course life is turning from great to fantastic.

Sometimes it's not things that are holding us down. It may be us holding on to them too hard.

Cheers and hope next year would be fabulous as well! With SEP coming before i know it.

And soon i have to dig out my 2010 resolution and start making a new one!

happy 6th birthday blog!

2010-11-25T04:58:00.001+08:00

haha seriously though, i dun remember the date, and i had always relied on qw's blog's bdae to remind me.

anw blog, may you have many years to go, lol.

It's getting too hot in here.

2010-11-06T16:51:00.002+08:00

Today my wife was too hot, but it turned off automatically at several points of my starcraft mania. I checked her(GPU) temperature and was shocked to see an idle 90+ degrees Celsius and peak 105+ degrees Celsius!

I couldnt stand it after several times of auto shut down(my 4850 card has a auto shut down temperature of 110 degree celsius), so i went to service her. took out the heatsink and fan compartment(i swore i took out more than 15 screws) and gave it a thorough clean. Shocked but relieved to see theres a super thick layer of dust choking the fins, blocking airflow from the fan. I was relieved because i think that that is surely the problem.

after assembling everything and played starcraft again, checked the temperatures and they went down to 56 degree celsius idle and 68 degree celsius busy! omfgfg. ok back to playing.

thank you for coming into my life

2010-10-15T03:03:00.002+08:00

life is strange. it could have gone any other way, but it had to be this way. i have to be thankful for all the other ways that didnt work out for my life to be this way, right now, at this very moment, with you :)

i hope this stays forever,

even though forever is always too much to ask for.

2010-09-12T13:36:00.000+08:00

我要的东西不多，但因为我曾经想要的都得不到，我学会了少期望什么。但是可能因为你而破例，心不碎，隔着一边也没用。我的心会碎吗？

mozart

2010-08-26T23:42:00.002+08:00

listen to this when you are tired of songs with overly reused themes and chords!

i love stats

2010-08-15T22:43:00.001+08:00

Depending on the context, an independent variable is also known as a "predictor variable," "regressor," "controlled variable," "manipulated variable," "explanatory variable," "exposure variable," and/or "input variable."

A dependent variable is also known as a "response variable," "regressand," "measured variable," "observed variable," "responding variable," "explained variable," "outcome variable," "experimental variable," and/or "output variable."

Source: wikipedia

the only permanent thing in life is change

2010-07-28T21:46:00.006+08:00

before:
whole night of 28th july was spent trying to install win 7 itself, where there was always a stuck in the installation after numerous tries. I was too tired and went to sleep with a disabled PC.

Woke up on 30th july feeling energised again, I tried to install win 7 again, getting the same result (stuck at 0% of Expanding windows files).

Found a completely unburned sector(s) on the install disk and became very suspicious. I went on to plug back my old HDD, did a little google, and burned a brand new disk using the Windows 7 USB/DVD download tool. Viola, disk looks perfectly burned now. Even made a bootable USB drive just in case.

10.30am~ish. Elated to see % get past 0... 1..2..3...90..91....99.....100!!!

11am~ish.

there are still much more to be done -- installing important progs and migrating my whole hdd over

[continued]

migrating software i used. dled norton ghost 15 and acronis, but in the end this simple program is all i need.

successfully migrated my most recent HDD. went on to migrate the HDD i had before that (used back in the JC days).

failed many times. went on to do chkdsk several times. realised that chkdsk can actually be done in windows! (provided the drive is not in use of course)

my last try before totally giving up..

success!!

tada!!

(yes you are not mistaken, thats the d2 icon - back in those days where there were no daemon tools, i copied the whole d2 disk to my hdd to act as a play disk/install disk)

Shutdown and removed the ancient HDD.

End product:

Oh my thats like one whole day spent. But definitely worth it. Now i have 3 generations of hard disks in a single hard disk!

Now~ to slowly fill the 2 very empty bars that i have. haha!

- the end -

my last post... before i go for my first ICT

2010-07-11T17:15:00.002+08:00

haha. kinda having a little weird feeling now. i guess its a combination of not having anything to do now and a little bit of anxiety for wad may come for ICT. reminds me of the first day of NS.

difference is that i dont have to carry a sdfgdakjhgdds big bag all across the island.

Beacons

2010-07-01T04:32:00.004+08:00

It's funny how we would want to share our thoughts yet keep the innermost ones out of everyone's reach. It's such an irony that this archaic blog of mine was named The Sanctuary because in the end most of the time it is actually a 100m range for my rant bullets.

Things around us move on, people too. So what if i remain unchanged, feelings and dedication and all. Would I stay relevant?

I envy practical people. They make decisions and move on. Maybe i dislike them for their trend. Or maybe im just jealous.

I think im just irrelevant in this society.

Outdated values.

People call me pessimistic, but i trust my judgement.
We are losing time all the while,
and we dont have much to dither with false hopes and expectations.

We are aging.
I thought i can just waste my life away doing nothing, but where exactly is this feeling of anxiety coming from?

My future is dim. And there are no lighthouses for me.
No harbour to dock,
I sail away to my distant memories.

2010-06-18T03:54:00.001+08:00

You're the only star, in the film I never made.

2010-06-11T00:50:00.001+08:00

im super bored

despair

2010-06-06T04:09:00.002+08:00

http://www.facebook.com/notes/jansen-ko/letter-to-a-christian-girlfriend/331261178826

Had I the heavens' embroidered cloths,
Enwrought with golden and silver light,
The blue and the dim and the dark cloths
Of night and light and the half-light,
I would spread the cloths under your feet:
But I, being poor, have only my dreams;
I have spread my dreams under your feet;
Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.
-William Butler Yeats

Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able?
Then he is not omnipotent.
Is he able, but not willing?
Then he is malevolent.
Is he both able and willing?
Then whence cometh evil?
Is he neither able nor willing?
Then why call him God?"
- Epicurus

this place sux

2010-06-05T03:37:00.003+08:00

i feel sg sux to the core.

it seems like people here(note i didnt mention sg-reans) are so self-absorbed, that complaining about their self-absorbedness, makes me look self-absorbed.

am i supposed to feel sympathetic about people who are so "busy" who can go overseas trips and have fun in camps so much so that they cant accomplish their SUPPOSED tasks?

am i supposed to do all their tasks for them just because i leave more personal time to well, myself? not that i want to, but i dont have the money for such a busy schedule. Even travelling to orchard road everyday just for walks would cost alot of money(from transport fees).

so im being LAZY i guess.

sg sux totally.

and i fking hate to be in super inefficient managements. ARGH!

people whom i want to thank

2010-05-29T02:01:00.004+08:00

albom mitch

andrew furmanczyk

currently, this list has only one name, but of course this is not all.

the names that im going to put in here are people who inspired or helped me deeply one way or another. (but sad to say i may somehow forget, so im doing this in case of that:))

things to do: in life

2010-05-28T20:41:00.003+08:00

not done, somewhat done, done!

be in love with someone

travel around the world with her

- europe, japan, usa, canada(or somewhere cold)

marry her

start a family

tour with kids

watch the children grow up

be proud of them

retire happily

grow old with the one i love

rest in peace

the black swan

2010-05-16T02:22:00.002+08:00

suppose earth was destroyed and a few people managed to hop on to a space shuttle designed for sustainable life in space.

suppose if there are 1 bil bacteria(just a rough figure for simplicity sake) living in an enclosed space, and there is 1:1billion chance that a bacteria would mutate to be able to wipe off humankind easily. now can you realise the significance of such a black swan?

a low probability event that has an extremely heavy consequence.

when i uplorry

2010-05-15T03:07:00.006+08:00

its been a very long time since i really blogged about myself and my life. haha. even if one day there is a possibility of me being famous, and have the luck to have a biographer, please please dear biographer, please do note that this blog is more of a target board for my rants and it does not truly reflect my true self! hahaha! cant believe im talking to my 'biographer' now.

but well, let today be an exception to the norm.

okay, on this nice cloudy day (to be considered chilly for this little island of singapore) i went bowling with my stats/chem frens. had quite alot of fun. and i finally get to know how to bowl by adding spin to the ball! u know those kind where e ball seems like dropping into e long kang but manages to spin back into e middle chioness!

haha but now my middle 2 fingers are hurting bad, because while experimenting, i hurt my hand during a time when e ball hit e ground early, with my fingers still inside e ball :'(.

i cant believe that i had done really nothing tonight. :'( i wish to be more productive but i want to have fun as well. hmm this problem would be solved if i can find something that i like doing, that will at e same time contribute to my life?

that is something i may never be lucky enough to find in my lifetime!

alright off to sleep, or to perhaps to read some books i have bt'ed!

you all know what to do when things go out of hand haha

2010-04-29T21:26:00.000+08:00

CDTL presents

Mental Health First Aid (MHFA)

(An NUS Student Workshop)

Facilitators : Dr Ann-Marie Lew, Clinical Psychologist and Ms Florence Yoo, Counsellor

University Health Centre

Date : 13 & 14 May 2010 (Thursday and Friday)

Time : 9am to 5pm

Venue : Seminar Room 1, CDTL http://www.cdtl.nus.edu.sg/cdtlhome/gettocdtl.htm

Synopsis

Do you know someone with a mental health concern? Do you know someone who has ever encountered a mental health crisis? This 12-hour course is designed to improve your mental health literacy and give you skills to help others who may be developing a mental health concern or may be facing a mental health crisis situation. MHFA was developed by Betty Kitchener and Professor Tony Jorm in Australia, and is under the auspices of the ORYGEN Research Centre at the University of Melbourne

2010-04-28T02:07:00.003+08:00

http://www.personalitytest.net/types/descriptions/infp.htm

haha i realised i took this test about 4 or more years ago, and i was INTJ and now im INFP.

i guess people do change a little

update at 4.30am:

i cant believe what i did but i actually repaired my calculator at this unholy hour!! wow thats like so much money and trouble saved.

what happened to my calculator was that since after secondary school the screen has stopped showing the middle line of pixels(at the top row of numbers where it shows your previous actions). that made it incredibly difficult to tell + from the divide sign, and between 8, 9, 6, 3 and 0, completely miss the - sign when i was queuing up operations!

this year, the top line was also gone, that made things really worse.

well today i have had enough and i opened the calculator and miraculously managed to 'debug' the problem, and did some improvisations to my calculator. haha perhaps it may exploded any time, but who cares! well im so happy now! i just hope it still gives me accurate calculations lol!

2010-04-25T02:39:00.001+08:00

im running out of songs to play while im studying..

and,

i guess my whole life is a freaking joke.

list v.2010.04.22

2010-04-22T01:44:00.002+08:00

ok, this is not a list for wad i have to study, instead it would be wad i want to do in the holidays! haha this will act as a motivation.

- read The Black Swan

- read one of Richard Dawkin's books

- grab a book from each genre of stats to decide where i want to go from here!

to be updated~

2010-04-06T17:15:00.002+08:00

coool! perhaps next time ipad liao can expand the pathetic space for bigger keys. imagine if one person buys 4 ipads.. oh i forgot, iPhones are more expensive than ipads ...

To Do list v.03.04.10

2010-04-03T12:49:00.004+08:00

SP1201

$%^%$& report

ST2131

tutorial

MA1104:

Lab assignment 4

webcast/tutorial

MA2213:

hw assignment

2010-04-01T03:20:00.002+08:00

edmw serious and good read http://forums.hardwarezone.com.sg/showthread.php?t=2716040&page=2

and sth interesting

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=csGOJ9IGxQk&feature=player_embedded

human

2010-03-20T12:59:00.005+08:00

edit: 29/03/10

i started this post wanting to talk about the lack of human-ity in singapore.

to be precise, i target more specifically the lack of:

scenes of happy children running about on the streets:

they are in schools

smiling faces in the morning:

we dont smile when we experience winzip every 3 mins or so on the MRT

trails, or at least, slight hints of kindness in this polymorphic glob of ~~land~~ human mass:

we could perhaps blame the coagulation of excess and unneeded 'talents'!

of course i have to understand that this is no utopia, this is singapore.

a commercialised ~~nation~~ market where demand are always met with supplies and every entity, including its ~~people~~ capital goods can be put on a price tag.

haha just some random rants while waiting my hp to charge and trying to keep my mind off my unfinished tutorial which is impossible to complete.

i would love to move to some place where i dont have to go to bed everyday thinking yet another day have passed with me doing not the things that i want, and thinking, just thinking, and perhaps too much, that i am simply wasting my life away.

i want to LIVE!! how can i do so?! :'(

humans see humans do

2010-03-16T15:17:00.002+08:00

part 1:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pIAoJsS9Ix8&feature=related

part 2:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nHuagL7x5Wc&feature=related

perhaps this is how so many people all over the world are being exploited out of our human born traits.

this is how propaganda succeed

list v.2010.3.16

2010-03-16T11:00:00.004+08:00

ST2|31 - cheat sheet/tutorial/revision

MA22|3 - lecture/tutorial

SP|201

genus

to infinity and beyond

2010-03-09T23:33:00.002+08:00

why do people associated love to fools,

and wealth to the clever?

I had once seeked love,

one that i so wanted,

that i've never gotten.

since there are only 2 paths, one must be correct.

haha, what am i talking about?

as if i have any other way out.

fiukcng tired.

2010-03-07T01:25:00.003+08:00

a very tired day. pondered about some decisions i had made.
got done and over with 3 midterms in the hellish week.

realised that cs1101's lecturer is sadistically efficient, posting the mid term test solutions only 1 hour+ after we had left the exam venue. "marking has begun" he said.

too tired to receive the shock that i may not anticipate.
decided not to look at the solutions..

to those supporting me tmr.. <3<3 xiexie xiexie~ cya tmr~

this is wad the lecturer showed us while they collect our exam booklets

ps: couldnt find the original.. this 1 is angmoh version lol

2010-02-28T20:04:00.004+08:00

haha as if got time to game now..
they should design one for mugging instead

list v2.0

2010-02-24T15:29:00.002+08:00

Things to do before mon (done/70% done/not done) :

ma1104: tutorial, study!

ma2213: finish up assignment today

st2131: tutorial

sp1201: presentation

all i can tink of now

lists

2010-02-16T16:38:00.006+08:00

im running out of space for lists, so have to make use of my blogspace haha.

things to do this hols: (done/70% done/not done)

ma2213 - lab assignment 1, homework 1, revision if possible 2

st2131 - tutorial, revision if possible 3.

ma1104 - tutorial, maple lab assignment, revision + PYE if possible.

cs1104 -

guitar - practise

looks alot but i tink its possible. fight kill fight kill fight kill!

2010-02-14T10:38:00.001+08:00

"A wrong is a wrong and must be rectified, not justified."

my 1st day of ICT

2010-02-08T08:04:00.002+08:00

bad dreams and new uncomfy pillow are not independent events.

today i woke up to a shocking dream :(.

I dreamt i was unfortunately handpicked by s@f to serve reservice in afghanistan.. in the dream my friends and i (yes i know 2 of them) were clueless about how long we are going to stay there! when one of them suggested 2 years, i said "how can it be 2 years? then go one time clear all the ICTs liao" (rofl.. but the setting wasnt really funny.. it was quite serious!)

the first day reporting to the unit before we fly off to afghanistan, we have to find our way to a "secluded part" of a army camp. in my dream i said, "omg i saw this place a few days ago from the mrt, and now im here! omg!" (the place was near a mrt track).

so we continued on to find this place.. then there are one or two regulars came to guide the way in. suddenly, this short journey became something like a obstacle course thing.. with real toxic and human "fake enemies" where we have to avoid being hit so as not to incur being served with a puddle of stinking mud or sth.. which i luckily didnt have to suffer from... cos i managed to complete it smoothly.

in retrospect now, it was absurd.. there are "monkey bar"-like obstacles, and tactical urban movement sections.. i even dream of the encik saying good! cos i cleared the monkey bar.. LOL. in the end this thing was more like a final test b4 sending us to the real mission, where by we were informed that we only have to stay in afghanistan for 2 days. 2 days i thought i was okay. thats why i didnt try to downpes in my dream. LOL.

just when we are about to set off.. time to wake up liao!

sunscreen

2010-02-08T01:02:00.000+08:00

Wear sunscreen.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don't worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 p.m. on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't.

Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone.

Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's.

Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.

Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.

Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.

Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out.

Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you're 40 it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen.

took it from some forum. quite meaningful stuff.

2010-02-05T19:53:00.002+08:00

《听见》-恶作剧之吻
你不开心的眼仿佛将我推到悬崖边缘
距离就算在靠近眼前我们一样没焦点
没有你的世界就像寒冬没有春天依畏少了你培在身边
我的四季只剩下冬天悲伤喜悦回忆不断重演　
静下来的世界有我的思念也有你的空虚无边
　
你有没有听见寂寞的声音悄悄在蔓延
它住近我们之间守候着我和你的永远
你有没有听见思念的呼唤传遍每条街
就算你走的再远累了回头我就在你的身边
你有没有听见寞的声音悄悄在蔓延　
它住近我们之间守候着我和你的永远
你有没有听见思念的呼唤传遍每条街
就算你走的再远累了回头我就在你的身边

2010-02-03T21:39:00.002+08:00

"Few Singaporean will be keen to take up jobs at such low wages which are hardly enough to survive in Singapore. There is no minimum wage in Singapore. Employers have the complete autonomy to set the wages as they see fit and with the easy availability of cheap foreign labor, they have few incentives to employ Singaporeans who cost more."

QFT.

Haix. When the higher ups say singaporeans wont work for xxxx kind of jobs, it isnt because we find it degrading. It is because the pay really like shit. Since foreign workers are so easily available, can people argue that it helps Singaporeans to create jobs? Perhaps if the companies would hire more management people using the money saved from these cheaper workers? Or perhaps they would just pocket the profit.

When they say we ownselves buey gan(cmi) when competing with foreign students is school, did they realise that we are not of equal footing? While some of us have to work like shit, take part time to pay our school fees, they are invited here with scholarships and allowances that are instead not given to capable singaporeans.

Why then they ask us to find partners and have kids, when i have to struggle to keep myself afloat on the bell curve that is flooded by so many of them, worry about my expenses, going for reservice and ippt. How do they actually expect us to find time to even date.

Im one of the ones getting annoyed by the % of immigrants here.

This is not the place i would be happy in if the situation continues.. i really hope some good people would stand up against these policies. i would give them my vote(hopefully my area is contested to begin with!)

2010-01-25T21:25:00.001+08:00

because sometimes when we dont move on, time moves us along

2010-01-23T09:20:00.002+08:00

its official, 22 years without girlfriend!

haha actually its not so much about having a girlfriend or not la.. after all it's just a label.

but one cant deny the sense of security it gives in life.

to have something to fall back to.

a launch pad to greater things.

its like the aircraft carrier you return to after your mission,

the housten you report back to in your space exploration

the base you return to after you have made the greatest journey-

life.

flying high/not so high/low/(replace with an adverb) without a place to return to.

i wish myself a happy 22nd!

2010-01-19T17:56:00.001+08:00

默默在你的身后守候的我 多想看你不经意的笑容 或许我的心你不懂 我会努力让你感动  在你眼中有多麼笨拙的我 决不放弃追逐你的执著 只要你能再多些回应我 一个笑或点头全接受  能不能再靠近一点点 大声说出你所有感觉 别再紧紧关在只有自己的世界 温暖太阳为你迎接  能不能再靠近一点点 能不能再勇敢一点点 就算让我知道我永远只是单恋 我也会藏著感谢 笑著和你说再见  默默在你的身后守候的我 多想看你不经意的笑容 或许我的心你不懂 我会努力让你感动  在你眼中有多麼笨拙的我 决不放弃追逐你的执著 只要你能再多些回应我 一个笑或点头全接受  能不能再靠近一点点 大声说出你所有感觉 别再紧紧关在只有自己的世界 温暖太阳为你迎接  能不能再靠近一点点 能不能再勇敢一点点 就算让我知道我永远只是单恋 我也会藏著感谢 笑著和你说再见

2010-01-19T16:27:00.002+08:00

im finding the frequency of my sleeping increasing.

however, i still sleep once a day/or maybe less.

time must be accelerating.

tiger year is approaching. the next in line would be rabbit(my year).

it would be one "lun" (cycle of the chinese zodiac) from when i was primary 6.

how many luns to go before i cease to exist?

is it that when you finally want to live a life, life just seems so short.

2010-01-15T11:02:00.000+08:00

random quote from the internet

if you like cat - you are a care giver and won't expect anything in return
if you like dog - you expect same love/reciprocate in return

haha.. perhaps

2010-01-04T22:39:00.000+08:00

duno if e owner mind or not.. but this is a nice blog for a good read

http://leloveimage.blogspot.com/

2010~

2010-01-01T20:20:00.000+08:00

hihi! these are my resolutions for 2009.. as a tradition i shall talk about how much exactly i have achieved each of these!

RESOLUTION FOR 2009

1. Feel that i have chosen the right uni course

2. BE HAPPY

3. Spend my pre uni time wisely

4. IPPT GOLD PLEASE ($400!!!!!!!)

5. Have more friends!

7. Master guitar to a pro level ok?

Legend: Fulfilled, somewhat fulfilled, obviously not fulfilled

1. Though how much i know about stats currently is still of minuscule proportion. after exploring all the module description im kind of glad to see that it is almost what i would expect it to be.. haha chim.. but i use this method to at least psycho myself im right haha.

2. BE HAPPY.. well as a matter of fact i havent been happier since many years ago.. school is indeed a good place :) evidence: the number of green totally > than last year's. im using purple. im gay in its non-sexual sense.

3. seriously i dont remember exactly what i did during the hols.. i rmb working and playing the guitar and even reading up on bayesian statistics(though i've nv past the" A level" section of the book, and have never even treaded to the bayesian page. i was lost in the fundamentals of statistics prelude). i guess i rmb only the good things. HAHA. which is good!

4. See previous post. shant let the 3 letter S word spoil my entry:)

5. Quantitatively or figuratively(the english language.. seriously..) i feel this is fulfilled and the main reason why im so happy now :) its great to know so many great ppl. it is great to still keep in touch with the very same old friends who share a bond that would probably, and hopefully, never be broken.

7. well.. i actually got it more underway than last year.. so yup(pardon me for my lack of a better sentence). at least im in G3NUS.. which i feel is the best decision in this year!! hurray~ well.. i've finally performed live.. and recently i had just transcript/transposed/arranged/"or what u call it" a song for nian nian tuan. haha

2010. this time it would be a new chapter of my life.. totally. (nice number to make such a resolution as well.

well.. because im going out to CD with my g@y buddies(possibly in sexual sense, HAHAHA). i have no time, and had not thought of my resolution for 2010 yet. so i shall pen them down only tmr! (this entry would then be re-dated)

See you guys in 2010!

new design of fireworks

A new year, a new beginning for many; new things to look forward to; new resolutions.

Here goes..

resolution for 2010

1. BE HAPPY

2. Meet more new friends!

3. Continue to improve on my guitar skills!

4. Finally find someone i like who likes me also (hopefully)

5. Stay healthy

There.. the simplest wishes for a simple and happy life.

I hope 2010 will be legendary/awesome!!

wish me luck!

2009-12-30T16:05:00.001+08:00

2009-12-28T03:37:00.007+08:00

i would like to ask... can i ever find another person whom with i can fall in love to the same extend, to the same intensity? to go through what we did?!??

its fucking unfair

PS:
im going to collect small pockets of sentences like this and someday maybe write a novel or play/screenplay!

read me not

2009-12-26T03:13:00.002+08:00

for i dont lust the spiders which dwell not in the warmth of hearts but the winters of happily ever afters.

i love this very line that i've just created at 3am!

2009-12-20T23:09:00.000+08:00

the chords struck; the heartstrings resonate; but would there be music?

2009-12-05T04:17:00.000+08:00

花接受凋零风接受追寻
心的伤还有一些不要紧
我接受你的决定
你将会被谁抱紧唱什麼歌哄他开心
我想著天空什麼时候会放晴
地球不曾为谁停一停
你的明天有多快乐不是我的
(我的明天快不快乐都是我的)
我们的爱是唱一半的歌
时间把习惯换了伤口愈合
也撤销我再想你的资格
你的祝福一半甜的一半苦的
像我手中冷掉的可可
最最教人残念的总是未完成的
我只能唱著一半的歌
(另一半的歌)

也撤销我再想你的资格

你的祝福
一半甜的一半苦的
一半甜的一半苦的

像我手中冷掉的可可
最最教人残念的总是未完成的
我只能唱著一半的歌

to remind myself why am i studying so hard

2009-12-04T02:26:00.002+08:00

i want to understand the world better by having more knowledge of it,
and not hearing from emotional accounts.

only then will i be able to give less subjective and more objective views of what is happening around me.

lalala study hard!!

我的生活

2009-12-01T15:10:00.002+08:00

我的生活方式太过安全..做事总是打量过危险..
可能就因为这样.. 过的生活特别平凡..
平凡不好吗?

不过.. 感觉似乎正在错过什么是的..

5

2009-11-26T09:19:00.001+08:00

happy 5th birthday to my blog!!!

(its so convenient to have my blog bdae after qw's.. dont need to rmb.. shh dun let my blog know!!)

lying

2009-11-21T00:02:00.003+08:00

lying is analogous to being caught in a web.
the more you turn and twist, the less chance you get can ever out of it.

anger

2009-11-13T21:11:00.002+08:00

you may think that the only option is to swallow your anger or throw it at someone's face, but theres a third option; you can just let it go.

and only if u do that it will be truly gone.

手

2009-11-09T17:53:00.002+08:00

早安太阳.
认识您这么久了, 您依然没变.
您还是这么灿烂,您还是我在生活黑暗中的指南针.

手中的笔,不知被谁吵醒,
在白纸上写下了我对您的感情.
不知如何向您表达
我心怀中的情信
我把纸折成飞机
丢向天空翱翔.

就象我们爸爸赢取妈妈的海鸥
我暗暗希望它能飞进您的心窗.

右手牵手,左手被牵.
从前梦里的情人,
已在我面前.

右手牵手,左手被牵.

not bad sia.. nxt time can use for lyrics also..
anw this is hypothetical.. except if qw imagine this is what i wrote for him then i dun mind.. lol

dun mind my poor attempt to revise my chinese..

2009-11-05T00:34:00.001+08:00

misery loves company,
but would love find me one too?

Someone like me.

2009-11-04T00:45:00.002+08:00

His heart faltered,
but he recalled how you reminisce your trophies.
14, 16, 21;
and that,
you won it the day you took away,
something i was never expecting
to find back,
until today.

Today, someone else found it.
Though that I missed it very much,
"Finder's keeper", i say,
and i really hope that she really would.

she really would.

2009-10-31T23:04:00.000+08:00

when you are born with nothing,
you know the costs of everything.

2009-10-15T11:04:00.001+08:00

my ES1301 teacher said: "you should be in literature"

wherefore art thou juliet?

the tables turn

2009-10-12T02:30:00.003+08:00

it is time now.

the time to choose
the past, or the present;
to be the future.

the past, something i had known, for all these years,
something i had accustomed to.
pain and joy, to the last letter.
it was less of the latter.

the present, something i can see now, for its virtue,
something i can feel now.
exciting and new, it takes us as surprise.
it is much better than before, or so it is to be believed.

that i want to believe.

2009-10-02T02:16:00.001+08:00

because sometimes if you are really honest in what you want for life, life gives it to you.

2009-09-26T16:30:00.012+08:00

saturday i must:

go thru ec1301 tutorials -- done
read finish ec1301 lectures -- done
do ma1102r tutorial -- done
do finish ma1102r assignment -- fail .. :'( edit: done!

sunday i must:

do ma1101r tutorial -- done
revise 1101r abit -- done
read finish st1131 lectures -- doneeeeeeeeeee!

like it's of any use

2009-09-25T00:22:00.003+08:00

its amazing, how..

we know what is happening halfway across the globe
but dont know what is happening to our neighbours next door.

we know what is best for a 12-year old
but not know what to do when we are 20, or 40, or 80.

we can count how many times a person makes a mistake
but not know how many times we've made them ourselves.

its amazing how...

we complain of having so little time
and yet we spent so much time complaining.

like it's of any use

2009-09-15T12:58:00.006+08:00

Life is a multiple choice of:

What do you want to do today?

A. Study

B. Watch drama

C. Play computer games

D. Go out with friends/family

E. All of the above

Answer ( E ) Wrong. You wont have enough time.

just beat it

2009-09-04T01:32:00.002+08:00

we do this only after you are gone.

fighting, struggling to retain

hoping things would remain the same way.

hoping time to stop.

repeat.

repeat, the bits of memories that we now call memories,

only now.

do we regret it or will we just never learn?

2009-08-31T19:57:00.000+08:00

today while coming home i saw a mother holding (presumably) her 4-5 year old boy's hand and jaywalked at the traffic junction in front of bedok library as the driver of the bus i was on was honking at them.

seriously.. by jaywalking how much time can you save? 3 mins at most? when you have a child and you are holding his hands, walk slowly and enjoy what you have la! smell the roses!! wait till your boy grows up and become like me, like all of us, shout at parents! (or at least i shamefully admit i do...) Bo chap! Argue!

i seriously sometimes just dont get what other humans are doing.. Seriously. so either there is something wrong with me, or there is something wrong with them.

ok something wrong with me ba.

2009-08-21T20:12:00.003+08:00

if only i was born at a remote area on earth

where nobody will tell me that if i want to survive,

i need to do whatever to earn big money.

i dont want this kind of lousy life.

2009-08-09T17:27:00.001+08:00

i need help

dont paint my death with roses, it's almost petulant to do so.

2009-08-06T19:09:00.000+08:00

yay i have bid my 5 modules already.

gave up on Reporting Stats in media... min bid 400.. zz

with tutorials im hoping to let it squeeze within the 3 days ba.. hopefully can do it.
wish me luck.

screw the ES1301 for making me come back on saturday though.

2009-07-29T20:13:00.000+08:00

either im very unfit now,
or i just love to sleep whenever i lie on my bed.

2009-07-09T00:30:00.002+08:00

i see so many people, praying to their gods.

im a free thinker.

i have no gods.

do gods even exist?

why?

why are we suffering?

why are we here, and you are up there?

why do i feel pain,

when she leaves

when solitude swallow me whole

when she never came

when i was all alone?

i am alone.

why did you make me this way?

why do i have to be born in the first place?

why if life is a gift,

mine started with a debt?

i am born:

to repay my parents' kindness

to repay to society

to repay to god

to carry the sins of our ancestors

to be burdened by the earth they left behind.

why do you appear to give us the gift to choose,

when we cant even choose

whether we wanted to be born,

into this shit.

to clean up other's shit.

i want to be born oblivion.

can you make me more so?

i dont want to be good.

i want to live life to it's fullest, too.

i want to see the moon in it's brightest glow,

without wondering if it's silky loins made by greenhouse gases.

i want to see the river weaving through mountains and carrassing the earth,

without the plastic bags.

i want to live more for myself.

i want to be more selfish.

because im tired

im tired trying to live.

without going against my conscience.

why do you make the world this way,

god?

why give me so many hardships so that i would grow strong,

if i cant even forever think of fighting you for my right to live, or die.

why do you even bother to come,

just to mess up our life.

you give and you take and you give and you take again.

i hope i truly amused you.

why do you make the world this way,

god?

i concede.

Thinker Theory

2009-06-13T03:07:00.005+08:00

going by the scientific point of view(im a free thinker btw),

we as living beings, we have the so called consciousness or "soul" or the ability to think and to be aware of the surroundings are all because of the brain.

that is to say, when we die, or the brain dies, this so mentioned consciousness is going to disappear as well.

i know several religions believe in the afterlife, be it the subsequent phase be utopia, or an indefinite loop of reincarnation or other wise. but what if science is true?

will we, or i, come into senses as a completely new person like how i remembered coming into this world, when we, or i die? i was already probably 4-5 years old then.

so with my passing away, most probably all my data i have gathered this lifetime would stay in that dysfunct brain. the memory of me even discussing or pondering about this subject would like rest of the memories and complex thinking algorithms built from young soon dissipate to becoming maggot food or rather, hydrocarbons, oxides, or carbon dioxide into the air.

even if i do intuitively 'take over' or should i say "feel" from another new form or body, a newborn baby, I wouldn't have the data to deduce i did this incredible feat of space-time quantum leap. but i now see it is impossible now if u think in term of physics. would an event happening in other remote non-referenced frame trigger something in another frame? okay i dont understand what im saying also in the last sentence, but yeah its impossible.

so there u go. enjoy your life before it ends, without compromising the enjoyment of others. that's known as moral btw. soon we will all permanently "shut down" and this is the only time you regret not having pre-installed Windows operating systems. but death isnt so nice that they save ur work nicely and slowly purge your unwanted data. its more like a irrecoverable BSOD and your system does not support reboot because you have a water cooling system linked to your OS which when the OS fails, it would stop working and your system will be fried in 5 minutes if you dont recover in time.

okay enough of computers lol. back to topic.

to summarize:

1. you can never be bill gate's grandson or great grandson.

2. neither can you be any one else's

3. the ability to think and sense your surroundings is truly a gift. learn to appreciate.

4. you only live this once. try to be happy(it's weird giving advice to myself when i dont seem to follow them)

2009-06-05T23:53:00.002+08:00

i dont know why, but when i return to singapore to my seat here in front of my computer,

a sudden wave of sadness and grief just splashes back on me.

i hate this place.

almost suicidal.

im tipping over a cliff.

im just waiting for someone or something to give me a push.

this is what i do when im bored.

2009-05-29T13:16:00.004+08:00

I have just had a breakthrough on my theory of fate.

** We cannot use the present to know the past - it would be at most a intelligent guess, but we can use the present to predict the future. **

Please put this quote to my name next time so i get famous ok? hahaha.

to show u some examples i can think of,

lets say in front of you is a car accident,

with this information and all the things you have, you could not have known what really really happened(assuming the driver and his passenger died soon after). It could be that they quarrelled on the car, then the driver maybe dulan and go crash the car against the curb that caused the car to overturned and killed both of them. It could also be that the driver sneezed and or fell asleep that the car accidentally went on the curb and the car overturned and killed them.

what you know now, the both of them bleeding profusely, and suppose this is outside sungei gedong road, and in 1 km you have sungei gedong medical centre, and probably 10km you have NUH, then lets say singapore no more money for helicopter, and your battery no batt. you can know with information that you are able to obtain that the two person are going to die.

to see this in terms of functions, A -> B.

Lets say current situation is A1, and it is defined by causal and deterministic laws that B1 will definitely happen. B1 will happen.

but if event B1 happened, you cant be sure that it was A1 which caused it.

This is something like your A maths where you have to this function is 1-1 and is not likewise with f inverse.

Gibson's First Law of Fate:

So with all the information available and extractable, we are only able to predict the future.

In equation form, A->B =/= B-> A

though the idea is simple, i will define this as my first law.(susceptible to changes)

by the way, there are no such thing as miracles or perfectly random events. (even dice tossing if you can control the angular velocity and height and time of flight, fluid properties(unless u throw it on vacuum) and surface properties of table (or hand if u catches it) and so many more factors, a certain result would most definitely occur).

passion. find me.

2009-05-05T23:06:00.003+08:00

because i have nothing to do.

because i dont know what to do.

because i dont know what i love to do.

i am,

inhuman.

kill me if im not already dead.

not alive, but half dead.

my life.

end it. end it. end it.

for me.

please.

something random :)

2009-03-21T00:35:00.001+08:00

sumqingwei says:
fman go watch what show
sumqingwei says:
tv?
Gibson says:
duno him
Gibson says:
the art of killing
sumqingwei says:
haha
Gibson says:
Long Division of humans
Gibson says:
High Performance Killing
sumqingwei says:
haha
Gibson says:
haha i just tot of a random idea
Gibson says:
if u managed to stop photons in a room
Gibson says:
wad will u see
Gibson says:
then photons wont hit your eyes
Gibson says:
unless u move to them
sumqingwei says:
err particles of light?
Gibson says:
ya
Gibson says:
so if u move closer to another object or person
Gibson says:
u can actually see what u suppose to see 0.0000000000000000000000000001 second later
Gibson says:
then if u walked backwards
Gibson says:
u can actually see what happened 0.0000000000000000000001s before
Gibson says:
v interesting rite
sumqingwei says:
that is if u can stop light?
Gibson says:
ya la
sumqingwei says:
if cannot stop means u must move faster than speed of light?
sumqingwei says:
lol
Gibson says:
actually i had done it
Gibson says:
everyone had done it
Gibson says:
haha
Gibson says:
not stopped la
Gibson says:
but captured it
Gibson says:
cameras haha
Gibson says:
photos and videos
sumqingwei says:
lol -.-
Gibson says:
captured the state of it
Gibson says:
haha really... sia
Gibson says:
amazing rite
sumqingwei says:
study physics
Gibson says:
must blog this
Gibson says:
stop typing ah.. i copy our convo

fast and furious

2009-03-12T01:17:00.005+08:00

wow.. just when i wanted to sleep i suddenly saw this!!

D: 1.7mb/s!!! download!! omg

dropped back 100+kb/s le..

lol and what a nice pattern the graph have.. like ancient character of shan(mountain)

it dropped at the end because that particular torrent dl finish liao.

how i wish everyday dl so fast..

I applied into MIT and I got in!

2009-03-02T16:33:00.005+08:00

hahahahaha.. i anyhow apply then i got in!

i must jia you from now on.. everyone gimme support k? dont call me up for movies on times I have lectures/tutorials :)

Was too boring I had to blog.

2009-02-15T22:47:00.002+08:00

I have officially slacked for 4 months. its omfg when i realised it. Though it didn't felt long, but I'm currently bored to the state that playing games could make insane, and I can't last for more than 30mins each game I tried to play!

to be contined.. i try a new game

target update 20/01/2009

2009-01-20T20:42:00.002+08:00

things to do before uni:

learn guitar # halfway!

learn piano

learn tennis

decide what to do in life

learn economics # started first page but kinda stopped..

learn statistics

play ra3 ~ done!

play call of duty 5 ~ done!

play grand theft auto 4 # started, but my comp laggy so gave up and wait for comp upgrade

play starcraft 2

play diablo 3

watch heroes # reached current episode

watch gossip girl # reached current episode

watch bleach # reached current episode

watch code geass ~ done!

watch all movies i have # dling and watching..

get a job

get a new camera fone ~ done!

get a laptop

get a new pair of spectacles/contacts

get a guitar capo ~ done!

get a electric tuner (temporarily replaced by microphone and a neat software on my comp)

- those without tag are still untouched :'(

I wonder was i so focused all along or this thing really helped me to be very focused! Seems like i'm doing good and not wasting my life, though i definitely feel im wasting my life(wake up(12am), play comp, play guitar, eat, play comp, play guitar, play comp, eat, play comp, read book, sleep(2am))

even though I don't have high expectations of life, but still i feel that i might be disadvantaged by doing these instead of paving my way to a better career - building up networks, signing up internships, research and data collection. ALL THESE makes our life so commercialised. It's like one is measuring his/her quality of life using career success as a gauge.

There are 2 things I especially hate. People who make money USING friends, and the act of people making friends just to make money(or make use of them). I f-word-ing despise them. Sorry for my strong emotions :'(

green green green

2009-01-15T14:10:00.002+08:00

im old already

2009-01-11T18:36:00.010+08:00

To anyone who is reading this, you are hereby coardially invited to my birthday celebration!

WHAT?:
Gibson's 21st Birthday

WHERE??:
Aloha Changi, Yacht Club Chalet (see map for YCC)

WHEN???:
23 Jan 2009 (Fri), 6.30pm – 10.30pm (9pm cake cutting)

HOW????:
From Tampines Int, take bus 29 to GOVT CHALETS bus stop on Netheravon Rd.

There will be buffet dinner catered. Feel free to bring your +1s :)

Kindly RSVP* by 20 Jan 2009, so I can make arrangements for the food!

Sorry most likely no bbq, cause already catering food. But if anybody wants, you can make use of my bbq pit by holding your own gathering there. The more the merrier. :)

Map:

*just inform me who coming can le. tag or msn or sms me also can

Welcome to 2009

2009-01-01T22:12:00.002+08:00

2008's wishlist:
1. get out of army alive.
2. make more friends.
3. completely get rid of my acne.
4. stay happy and healthy.
5. everyone's wishes comes true.
6.
7. world a better place.

Legend: Fulfilled, somewhat fulfilled, obviously not fulfilled

1. ok im talking now! so really glad!

2. okay.. it's mathematically correct so ya..

3. more or less

4. this is abit grey.. should have made it more clear. Cos 365 days ago i wasn't really happy either. 1 year ago i could do 2.4km in about 9mins and maybe below, but now after nua for so many months i doubt i can be nowhere near that la.. so erm.. more or less.

5. i dont know. maybe you do..? but i tink some have some dont have.

6. still trying my best

7. guess i dont need to explain much

Ok.. in overall, 2008 was a freaking fast year. The time when I had to do guard duty on 1/1/08 seems only days ago. Perhaps its army army army all the way, and the cool taiwan trip. Busy life passes very fast i guess.

RESOLUTION FOR 2009

1. Feel that i have chosen the right uni course

2. BE HAPPY

3. Spend my pre uni time wisely

4. IPPT GOLD PLEASE ($400!!!!!!!)

5. Have more friends!

7. Master guitar to a pro level ok?

Oh and i saw from yahoo that one should not make resolutions about one's physical aspect(fatter/thinner etc) cos will cause depression :'(

another lonely christmas gone

2008-12-27T00:15:00.006+08:00

new year is coming.. i need a job!!

been learning guitar the past few days.. so much that my left hand fingertips are so numb and sore and lil blue black :(.

nth to do.. and very sian, i shall update my "want" list..

things to do before uni:

learn guitar # halfway!

learn piano

learn tennis

decide what to do in life

learn economics # started first page but kinda stopped..

learn statistics

play ra3 ~ done!

play call of duty 5 ~ done!

play grand theft auto 4 # started, but my comp laggy so gave up and wait for comp upgrade

play starcraft 2

play diablo 3

watch heroes # halfway

watch gossip girl # reached current episode

watch bleach # reached current episode

watch code geass # left last 2 episode bu she de finish.. lol

watch all movies i have # dling and watching..

get a job

get a new camera fone

get a laptop

get a new pair of spectacles/contacts

get a guitar capo ~ done!

get a electric tuner (temporarily replaced by microphone and a neat software on my comp)

- those in blue are newly added!

- those without tag are still untouched :'(

not bad not bad!!

almost half all done/reached maximum state

the buying of things one... wait i get job then she de buy..

or my bdae actually quite near you know... *hint hint*

update: bought the capo!

today, tomorrow

2008-12-11T23:17:00.000+08:00

sometimes i feel singapore is not a very good place to be, and maybe the younger generation are getting more and more sheltered. I actually saw a thread on a forum titled Is it a MUST to offer seat to the pregnant or elderly. It's kinda sad hearing people asking this question. A singaporean especially.

It seems the people these days have to be told what they should do? This kind of question don't need to be asked in the first place. If one have the heart or consideration for others.. it comes naturally. It's not something under your moral dictionary, and if you have one.. i dont know why you even need it.

DOES anyone need to teach you to respect your parents? DOES anyone need to teach you not to bite the hands that bring you food?

Feeling kinda crap now.

look what you've done

2008-12-11T00:35:00.001+08:00

Was emoing and looking for old songs awhile then i found an old post of mine.. cant believe 4 years ago i talked like this! hahaha. but definitely that was a crazy day..

oh.. the song i was looking for is a special songs with its lyrics broken up and at midway of the song, it is sung from bottom up! v nice! but i forgot name liao.. if anyone know pls tell me..

SATURDAY, DECEMBER 18, 2004

Michelle Branch rox! Actually i mean her songs =)

Yes! I have been posted to another JC, NOT VJ! Why? Hahaha, cos i suck! Nvm about that. Different Jc so what? Haah.

Yeah, saw the fat man inside VJC General Office today! He is so chubby i almost wanted to squeeze his cheeky cheeks! Oh im getting crazy! I submitted a 1cm thick appeal to the office HAHAHA. Actually not 1cm la.. around.. 3mm and i mean it! Total of 17 pages :)

1st page is the form itself. 2nd and 3rd are sec3/4 results. 4th is PAE verification form. 5th is CCA records. 6Th is testimonial 7th onwards are all certs! yeah im damn talented ya know.. Hope they will accept! Or i go back and kick that fat man's butt keke.

Ouch gastric! Spent whole morning on this. Quite alot people appeal. ard 10 for science? is that alot? haha no idea! Im full of hope in everything! Im getting mad!

Wow another michelle branch song playing! Breathe and 'til i get over you are nice songs in terms of just the melody and stuffs, not the lyrics. But dido still rox!

Every 9 pts people get into vj and i 10 cant get in lol.. isnt that fun? Haha.

Last shoutout to all my frens! Good luck in your JCs/Polys ! Qw jia you ar! Yf good luck! Fman dont hobby too much (talking!) can liao! Yes i mentioned 3 names! Tonight headlines will be someone like this: Teen brutally murdered in Bedok Reservoir road. 3 friends suspected to be involved!

lifespan calculator

2008-12-10T16:31:00.000+08:00

您将于公元2081年11月22日去世！

您距离死亡还有： 72年 0月 4日 7时 29分 22秒

http://www.huoguan.com/survey/lifetest.do?username=1306780799#myspace.cn

too little too late.

2008-12-08T15:38:00.000+08:00

ahh.. its nearing the end of the year! to me, this year is incredibly fast.. which is good too. cos this year i ORD lo..

ah.. and i dug out my this year's resolutions to try and see if i've fulfilled them, and if not, try and do some last minute work!

2008's wishlist:
1. get out of army alive.
2. make more friends.
3. completely get rid of my acne.
4. stay happy and healthy.
5. everyone's wishes comes true.
6.
7. world a better place.

Legend: Fulfilled, somewhat fulfilled, obviously not fulfilled

Im going to post this again at the start of nxt year.. so i shant say much about them now.. cos the year has not ended yet..

kk. im gonna work on those with colours except green.. see what i can do in 20 odd days!

happy 4th birthday

2008-11-25T14:58:00.000+08:00

my blog is 4 years old! omg im so old.

Love Languages

2008-11-19T12:48:00.000+08:00

The Five Love Languages

My primary love language is probably
Quality Time
with a secondary love language being
Physical Touch.

Complete set of results

Quality Time:		9
Physical Touch:		8
Words of Affirmation:		6
Acts of Service:		4
Receiving Gifts:		3

Information

Unhappiness in relationships, according to Dr. Gary Chapman, is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. Sometimes we don't understand our partner's requirements, or even our own. We all have a "love tank" that needs to be filled in order for us to express love to others, but there are different means by which our tank can be filled, and there are different ways that we can express love to others.

Take the quiz

lazy bones

2008-11-16T22:07:00.001+08:00

I don't know..

After 2-3weeks of zuo bo-ing at home.

I suddenly feel very sian.

My interest for new games like RA3 and Call of Duty: World at War can only last for one mission worth of time in the games.

Perhaps it's because I'm playing all these alone.

Sad life..

It's funny.. how targets in games can be set so easily compared to real life. "To reach level xx by x days" Purpose is clear, methodology vivid. Sometimes i wonder how life is similar to games. For games, you know sooner or later you will stop playing the game, but yet you would still put in every time and effort to make everything right, while you are still playing the game. Life certainly is not forever, and yet you see SO much effort is put by different people trying to live better, trying to earn more money, trying to persuade people, trying to try things, trying to be DIFFERENT.

We are all the same. We are stubborn - stubborn for hope, and that makes us human. We know we will die anyway, but deep down inside we hope we wouldn't. At least not our spiritual soul anyway.

When we break up with somebody, we hope they would return. When we are poor, we hope we have enough money to get by. When we are down on our luck, we hope that the next thing to happen is luck. When we are being raped by qingwei, we hope we can rape him back.

When one loses hope, he/she hopes that things would just end.

Whoever who gives hope to people, gives people 'lives'. 'Lives' perceived by human's as good, because they hope that living is good. If i were to tell you there makes no difference between your existence and non-existence, you wouldn't mind not living.

Sometimes 'life' is not as good as people think it is, they start to blame 'life' for being bad. "I have a bad 'life' and there is nothing i can do with it." It's most unfortunate but in actual sense, one could say that the person's 'life' is not what he/she hoped for, and therefore wouldn't mind not living.

If we were just entities in this world, in computing sense, then i think hope and life are codes that humans can't do without. They are the guardians for the for or while loops. In actual fact, they are more like the brackets in the loop. It ensures that humans do what they do until their time is out - alas, the argument of 'duration less than x' no longer hold true.

Yes, while we are living, we may get to see a few other such brackets, or hope, that keeps us occupied doing specific things. One who sees hope in gambling, does gambling over and over again, until the specific time where he/she falls out of the for/while loop, in triump or defeat.

Humans are all the same. Data or as we term them as "memories" get passed from one human to another, and get flushed when forgotten/overwritten - 'broken pointers' in computer terms. Humans are the same. When their time is up, when they are done, they get deleted or flushed. If there is a need, a new entity would take over his/her previous responsibillities.

Ok.. im just very bored and didn't feel like playing any games, so i write all these for fun.

I'm off hoping to be a more happy entity for now!